TeenDramaWhore

Last Week’s Reaction Post

Keep refreshing this page throughout the show for plot developments, quotes and commentary.

EPISODE 3.17: Inglorious Bassterds

• Previously On: Dan and Vanessa sorta announce they’re together and everyone is happy, Agnes got payback on Jenny by drugging her, Nate saved her, Jack kicks Chuck out of the hotel, Elizabeth gave Chuck the hotel, Chuck doesn’t want to back down, Blair promises to give Jack a war
• The title is a play off the Oscar-nominated movie Inglorious Basterds.
• Q1: Every war has its weapons but on the Upper East Side, the rules of battle are simple–there are no rules.–Gossip Girl
• Serena is organizing knives. Um, okay.
• Nate comes in. It’s his birthday.
• Serena has a special night planned…a benefit for frogs.
• Chuck bought a table. They have to go.
• She says they’ll celebrate this weekend.
• He has lunch plans with Grandfather. He leaves.
• Serena is planning a game of Assassins because Nate loves it.
• Dorota took Nate’s phone so he can’t hear from people about it or check Gossip Girl.
• Serena gave Dorota some kind of gun for the game. It’s…weird. Supposed to be Dorota’s usual comic relief but eh.
• Jack is getting rid of Chuck’s things.
• Chuck is there, tells him he wants his hotel back.
• He asks if Jack is just trying to hurt him.
• Jack says Chuck isn’t “the man [he] used to be.”
• He says Bart always said Chuck was soft. Ouch.
• Chuck points out Bart left the company to him.
• And if he–Jack–wanted to wound him, he has.
• Chuck says he will do anything to get the hotel back.
• And Jack something has caught his eye.
• Eric is back!
• Apparently he was in Japan or something?!
• He’s trying to rebound from Jonathan, with the Japanese boys and now whatever boys he can find around.
• But only he and Jonathan are out in St. Jude.
• Jenny is harboring secret feelings for Nate, though she doesn’t say as much.
• Eric received a reminder about what S is planning for Nate’s birthday.
• Jenny suddenly excuses herself.
• Vanessa brings Dan coffee at the loft.
• Dan was up all night writing an application for the Tisch writing program.
• He won’t share it with her until it’s perfectly ready.
• Vanessa points out he used to–before they started dating–show him things as soon as possible.
• She gives him a first draft for her film project and asks for his app.
• Dan is hesitant but she insists and leaves.
• Jenny has gone to see Nate.
• She tried texting him but he can’t find his phone.
• She came to wish him a happy birthday.
• She gives him a gift. Not clear what it is.
• She says she’s sure he has plans already with Serena.
• He says he doesn’t. With his grandfather instead.
• She thanks him again for last week.
• This somehow tells him he should cancel on his grandfather.
• In a clothing store, Serena is telling Blair how Nate looked so sad when she made it seem she was blowing off his birthday.
• Blair’s not interested. She’s upset about Chuck being hurt by Jack.
• Serena says Chuck has Blair. The hotel is just a hotel.
• Blair says she doesn’t understand. Losing the hotel is proof Bart was right about Chuck being a failure.
• Serena tells Blair to buy a beautiful dress and show Chuck what he still has.
• Q2: Empire or no Empire, Blair Waldorf loves him.–Serena
• S leaves and Jack suddenly appears in the store.
• Blair kind of goes off on him for taking away the hotel from Chuck.
• Jack says he is willing to give the hotel back.
• Q3: Chuck can have the Empire and all it would cost is you…spending the night with me.–Jack
• Sigh. As I’ve been saying elsewhere, this happened in 1996 during season 6 of Beverly Hills 90210. Ginger demands $50,000 from Val or a night with Val’s boyfriend David. If she gets neither–and she particularly wants David–she’ll reveal some seriously damaging info about Val to the gang.
• 90210 promo
• Blair is appalled by Jack’s offer.
• Q4: I thought you really cared for him.–Jack
• Blair calls Jack demented.
• Jack says Chuck’s future lies in Blair’s hands.
• Q5: Well, not your hands exactly.–Jack
• Jack says Chuck doesn’t have to know.
• Blair says she’ll stick by Chuck’s side for however long it takes.
• And Jack says Chuck will never win if she does that.
• Dan tells Rufus he needs to get Polaroid film to help Serena with the Assassins game.
• Wow. Blatant promo for Bing. (They search “Polaroid film.”) Hate when they do things like that that.
• Dan confides in Rufus that he’s worried about critiquing V’s script now that they’re dating.
• He compares it to a What If–what if he critiqued all of Serena’s outfits when they were dating.
• Jenny and Nate are lunching.
• She asks Nate if she’s disappointed that S isn’t doing anything for his birthday.
• He says no, but he’s surprised because Serena is the type of person to do something.
• Nate and Jenny both say how they’re having a good time.
• She has the staff bring him a sundae with a candle. It’s kind of cute.
• Vanessa has come prepared for Assassins–trenchcoat and a camera.
• She concludes from Dan’s behavior that she didn’t like her script.
• He covers and says…
• Q6: You’re right. I didn’t like it. (pause) I loved it.–Dan
• He swears he has no notes.
• He asks about his app and Vanessa says she didn’t read it yet. Hmm. Wonder if that’s true.
• Dorota is nervous about the birthday preparations. They’re behind schedule.
• S calls Mr. Vanderbilt to stall Nate but Nate isn’t with him!
• She’s perplexed–where is he?
• Dorota likes the guys way too much.
• Nate tells Jenny he has to leave to get ready for the charity event with Serena.
• Q7: White shirt, black tie. Kind of think you’d have it down by now.–Jenny
• She gets a dazed look and Nate asks if she’s okay.
• Jenny says she gets kind of freaked out when she’s alone, given what happened last week.
• That convinces Nate he can be late for his thing with Serena and should stay with Jenny.
• Jenny’s phone buzzes. Gossip Girl sent out a blast that Nate is MIA and Serena needs to “find her man” and people should send text or pics ASAP.
• Jenny suggests they go to a movie. Clever! Hide him in the dark for two hours!
• Blair asks Chuck how his talk with Jack went.
• He compares it to negotiating with terrorists.
• Blair asks if Jack suggested something.
• Chuck says something he would never consider.
• I guess Jack shared his proposal with him, too.
• Blair says perhaps Jack will stop “toying” with him once he sees he can’t get what he wants.
• Chuck gets a phone call. Whoever it is, tells him Jack is planning to close the hotel.
• Blair and Chuck enter her place.
• He heads upstairs and Dorota hands her a note and a box.
• The card reads “One last chance to save your man” and it’s signed by Jack.
• Q8: Beware of Basses bearing gifts.–Gossip Girl
• 90210 promo
• Everyone is at the Assassins party. People are wondering where Nate is.
• Q9: Dorota has practically the entire Eastern Bloc on the lookout.–Serena
• Eric gets a message to his phone. It’s another Gossip Girl post. This one shows Nate and Jenny getting into a cab.
• He hides it from S.
• LOL Blair just made a comment to Serena about sleeping with Nate and killing that guy! (Season 1)
• Wish I got the quote!
• She’s asking Serena for advice on what is going too far.
• Q10: If someone does something awful but it’s for love, is it okay?–Blair
• S wants to know what Blair isn’t telling her but Blair says it’s nothing.
• Eric leaves Jenny a message, urging her to bring Nate to the party.
• Dan asks S where Nate is. Serena obvi doesn’t know.
• Dan goes looking for the camera Vanessa brought and finds his app with Vanessa’s critiques all over it.
• Not sure what is with V’s ski cap-like hat.
• Blair finds Chuck upstairs and asks if he’s going to join the party.
• Chuck says his lawyers–the true ones–said there’s nothing he can do to stop Jack from closing the empire.
• Blair reminds him that he can do anything because she believes in him.
• Woah! Chuck just snapped at Blair.
• Q11: When are you going to get it?! There is no way!–Chuck
• Have we ever seen him yell angrily like that?!
• Q12: I’m sorry. It’s not your fault. (pause) I am everything my father said I was.–Chuck
• He walks out.
• Blair pulls out the earlier box from under her bed.
• Serena is stressed out about Nate being MIA.
• Just then, the elevator opens and Nate comes in with Jenny.
• S is a bit perplexed to see Jenny with him, who apologizes that they’re late like it’s nothing.
• Q13: Uht oh, S. Looks like Jenny’s knives are sharpened and she’s ready to use them for the battle for Nate Archibald.–Gossip Girl
• I should also point out that in season 9 of Beverly Hills 90210, the gang was planning a surprise party for David and Gina purposefully kept him away and then showed up late with him just to get her claws in him and stick it to everyone else.
• We know the 90210 people didn’t bother watching the original but it’s becoming more and more clear that the GG peeps did!
• Serena explains the rules and process for Assassins.
• Nate doesn’t look too happy.
• But he’s slowly getting happier. I’m guessing he’s impressed.
• The game will take place over the city.
• Nate goes over to Jenny, says “nicely played” for keeping him distracted.
• Jenny takes the credit and walks away.
• Serena comes over.
• Nate hugs her and thanks her.
• She points out how late he was and he was supposed to be on time for their gala.
• He says Jenny needed him. S says she can see that. Ouch.
• Q14: We have four minutes left to live. Do you really want to spend it like this?–Nate
• Nate tries to get Chuck to play but he mumbles that he’s already dead.
• Cue montage of everyone dressed in black playing the game outside.
• Vanya stops Dorota. Dorota says she’s playing the game.
• Q15: Then I must do something before you die.–Vanya
• He gets down on one knee and proposes!
• Feels a bit out of place but still–aw!
• Q16: From the first moment I saw you, I knew you were princess. And every day you make me feel like king.–Vanya
• She enthusiastically accepts.
• People come and kill her.
• Q17: Now I die with happiness.–Dorota
• Eric is running and knocks Vanya over.
• Vanya says he’s okay because he’s engaged. Aw.
• Eric is enthused.
• Eric apologizes to the other guy he knocked into.
• They banter and flirt.
• He looks like Eric but a few years older. Creepy.
• Eric spies Nate running and then Jenny running right after.
• He says he has to take care of something.
• Q18: But dead or alive, I will be right back.–Eric
• He goes. The guy picks up the picture of himself Eric dropped.
• Jenny is still following Nate.
• Vanessa and Dan are having a stand-off.
• Q19: I’m kind of into this killer side of you.–Vanessa
• Dan makes a pointed comment about her marking up his app.
• She apologizes for not admitting earlier she edited it. She says she felt bad after he said her script was perfect.
• He says it wasn’t actually an A+. It was a D.
• Serena comes by and kills them. LOL She’s a master at the game.
• Eric finds Jenny and questions what she’s doing with Nate, someone she has “history’ with.
• Jenny blows him off.
• Serena and Nate catch up to each other.
• Serena says she knows Nate thought she forgot his birthday but he was still ditching their plans to be with Jenny–why?
• He says that Jenny went through something serious and he’s helping her.
• She prods for more and Nate explains what happened last week.
• Serena apologizes and asks if J’s okay.
• Q20: You’re such a good guy, Nate Archibald. Can I kiss you before I kill you?–Serena
• They kiss. And Jenny kills S. How appropriate.
• S gives J her approval to go kill Nate.
• Serena asks Chuck where Blair is.
• Chuck says she’s still playing but S says she isn’t.
• Chuck seems frightened and runs off.
• She’s not upstairs but he sees the box.
• Inside is the note from Jack.
• Cut to Blair walking into Jack’s hotel room.
• She takes off her jacket. She’s wearing the dress.
• Q21: When all other weapons fail, there’s always human sacrifice.–Gossip Girl
• Blair looks both scared, nervous and disgusted.
• One Tree Hill promo!!!! No new clip or anything. Just the season 7 promo and the VO says the show returns April 26 with a new episode.
• (It actually returns with a repeat on the 19th.)
• Jack says he knew the memory of their past would bring her back.
• She says she’s not here for him. She’s here to get back Chuck’s hotel.
• She brought a contract with her, going over what will happen now and after.
• The screen just went black for the second time. Weird.
• She does this, Chuck gets the hotel back–and never finds out about the night.
• Jack signs. Not sure if he even read it.
• Q22: That dress looks almost as beautiful on as I’m sure it does off.–Jack
• Jenny is still chasing Nate.
• They end up in the basement of some building.
• Nate goes into a room and Jenny locks the door behind them!
• Q23: Looks like it’s death do us part.–Jenny
• Dorota is telling the party guests maybe they’ll find true love, too. Aw.
• Eric comes up and asks if she knows who the guy in the lobby was. She says no.
• Dan and Vanessa are talking about their script and his app.
• She tells Dan to write about what he knows.
• He pretty much points out how valuable her feedback is.
• This was a very boring storyline.
• Jenny says this is the most fun she’s had in months.
• Jenny says since it’s his birthday, she should let him win.
• He goes close to grab “kill” her and instead she KISSES him and kills him!
• Q24: Uht oh. You’re dead.–Jenny
• In more ways than one!
• She leaves. Nate is stunned.
• Q25: I’m here because I love Chuck. Don’t flatter yourself to think I’m going to enjoy this.–Blair
• She doesn’t want foreplay. She goes to undress and he stops her.
• He slowly, sensuously kisses her and says she can go.
• Blair is confused.
• Jack says he told Chuck he wanted Blair or the hotel. And Chuck gave him Blair.
• Blair is shocked, saying that Chuck had no idea about the plan and would never do this to her.
• Jack says Chuck told him he knew Blair would take it upon herself to do whatever it took, as in he knew she would eventually go along with what Jack was proposing just so Chuck would get his hotel.
• He says he has proof Chuck was in on it. He sent him to the store, paid for the dress, etc.
• Blair is stunned.
• I missed some good quotes there explaining it all. Sorry guys!
• Nate and Jenny are in an elevator.
• Q26: Okay, soooo, what the hell was that?–Nate
• Jenny says it was just a game and they were finally having fun again.
• They return to the party.
• Jenny announces to everyone that she won and they all applaud.
• Eric looks very uncomfortable and disappointed.
• Blair finds Chuck.
• Q27: Please tell me Jack was lying. You wouldn’t betray me like that.–Blair
• Blair says she went for him, to save the hotel, to do anything to help him.
• Chuck says he didn’t ask because he knew Blair wouldn’t do it then. But if he stayed behind the scenes, pulling the strings, he could get her to do it.
• Q28: I did what I had to win. I can’t let my feelings lose all that I built.–Chuck
• Q29: “Even if it means losing me instead? All I did was love you.” “The worst thing I ever did. The darkest day I ever had. You said you would stand by me through anything. This, Blair, is anything.” “I didn’t think the worst thing you did would be to me.” “You went up their on your own.” SHE SLAPS HIM! “Goodbye, Chuck.”
• Her face was heartbreaking. Her voice, too. And the tears!
• She walks off.
• He looks genuinely surprised she reacted this way.
• He hesitates and then leaves.
• Nate tells Serena is the best birthday ever.
• S says she still needs to give him his present and leads him away.
• Jenny sees. She’s not happy.
• Q30: When the battle ends and weapons are put away, new strategies take shape.–Gossip Girl
• I guess Jenny is plotting again in her mind.
• V is in her dorm.
• A student comes in, gives her a note.
• Says she didn’t know V was applying for the Tisch program. It’s really competitive.
• Damn. I should’ve seen that coming.
• Elevator at Eric’s opens. It’s the guy from earlier.
• He went door to door looking for him! Cute or creepy?
• They introduces each other. The guy’s name is Elliot.
• Blair is crying as she takes off the dress.
• Chuck goes to see Jack.
• Jack asks if Chuck is mad.
• Jack said he had to tell Blair that Chuck set it up.
• Chuck makes a call, telling security to get Jack out.
• Chuck says he and Blair will get past this.
• Q31: Don’t you get it? Blair’s seen the real you now. She can never get past that.–Jack
• Jack tells Chuck to enjoy the hotel since it’s all he has now.
• Jack leaves.
• Chuck looks at the contract from earlier.
• Gossip Girl wonders who will live to see another day.
• Promo: Chuck wakes suddenly like he had a bad dream, Blair says they won’t be lonely in hell, Blair and Chuck kiss, Nate asks Jenny and Eric if S had brunch with them, they say no, Serena tells Nate to trust her, Jenny and Nate wonder why S has a key to a hotel, a voice says “hello beautiful” (or something like that)

Those are my thoughts. What are yours?